The Best Thing That God Ever Created is A New Day

Half Nelson and why I love films.

What an amazing film. After seeing it reminds me of why I love watching movies, at least the ones that are good(hahaha) or ones that leave a mark on you. It could almost be anything. A lesson, an unsettling feeling, a handful of emotions, a good laugh or even a good cry. But mostly for me its the experiences and emotions in the movie that you can relate to. 

Happy 22nd Birthday to me!

There was this time when I was kid (around 5 years old), I asked my mom why I was the youngest and why I couldn’t be the eldest. I always wanted to grow up fast. I’d wished time to fast forward somewhere far from the present. And here I am 22 years old and feeling lost. The future still excites me however I’m scared that time won’t permit me to fully grow up and earn the things I dream of. But when I see my relationships with my family and friends, I feel better. I can subtly see vague images of the man I’m supposed to be. 

All in due time. 

1 week ago / 5 notes / journal, personal,

My mom hates me for not going to church.

I don’t believe in the Catholic Church and its teachings. No offense to Catholics.

Why would I want to be a part of an organized religion, one which says being gay is a sin.

Yes, I’m a sinner because of a thousand reasons. But not for being gay. I’m struggled so much to accept that and I don’t need the church’s condemnation every Sunday.

She says I’m selfish and I don’t listen to her. I’m sorry if my actions and decision hurt her. Someday, I just hope she understand my reasons. I love you and Happy Mother’s Day.

Am I still looking through the lens? The lens where I see things differently from what they really are.

On Gay Marriage

I remember the time when someone I follow here on tumblr posted about the futility of marriage for the lgbt. I went anon and messaged him my rebuttal. I didn’t have the confidence before hence the hiding behind a gray icon. I was right and still is that’s why I’m posting it here and because of  the Tom Bridegroom video. 

*****

Someone I follow: IF YOU WANT TO BE WITH SOMEONE, JUST FUCKING BE WITH SOMEONE.

Sometimes, I really don’t understand why marriage is such a big deal. We go out of our way to detest the church and doctrines and all that for condemning the LGBT community, and yet we clamor for their very ACCEPTANCE when it comes to marriage equality? It’s like saying FUCK YOU, BUT PLEASE LOVE ME.

I say FUCK marriage in general. I don’t see why someone can’t just COMMIT to another person without some guy/girl in a robe reciting a speech from an old book.

I was raised a Catholic, and I’ve attended Catholic schools all my life, but I still don’t see the point of marriage. Don’t burn me at the stake for it. I’m really just ticked off about blah this and blah that about LGBT marriage when it shouldn’t even matter if you really love someone.

What’s marriage nowadays but a wedding anyway?

*****

I: Your view on gay marriage is fucked up. The thing that you don’t realize is that being married entails your partner with health insurance and other benefits just like the straight cohorts. I’d say, it is not a matter of Church’s acceptance but rather of practicality and most of all equality. Marriage is not just a commitment to the church. It’s also commitment to your partner and the law that you will be there with each other, especially if one is in need of help.

*****

SIF: I didn’t know health insurance was a big deal, either. People in this country don’t talk about it.

Like I said, I don’t see why one can’t just commit without some piece of paper or whatever for proof. Why do we, whether under the law or the eyes of God, have to prove our commitment?

I stand by my opinion that marriage in general should just be dissolved. If it’s creating so much inequality, then just abolish it. Reduce it to what it really is nowadays - a pretty little ceremony.

Why are you anonymous? If your goal is to educate me on my skewed notions, you should do so personally.
 

*****
I: A plethora of things is not talked in this country yet it does not mean they are not important. Maybe to you who seems well off in life, it is easy to dismiss that health insurance and other related things are not relevant. Anyway,if you think marriage is shitty in general, then you should just have said it so. Don’t put into context that gay marriage is about the LGBT community trying to gain acceptance from fuck ups. If you detest marriage so much, hate the church for establishing it but not the ones who believe that gay marriage and equality are important.
I made my case and stood up for what I think is right. They are a lot of ignorant and misinformed persons about the LGBT community, even within the community. It is essential that we exchange ideas. Talk about issues and find a way to settle any misunderstanding. Everyday we are learning and that what matters here. 
The reason of doing this is that I find a handful of people who are fighting for LGBT rights here in Philippines. Most LGBT issues, if not all, are still taboo. The big pink elephant must be noticed. It is the only way to have equality. 

*****
 
He, later, deleted all the posts related to this conversation. 
Right now, I’m leaning on the side where I’m losing hope that Philippines will never give equal rights for its lgbt citizens. 

Thinking a handful of thoughts simultaneously is not doing me any good.

Hence my sleepless night.

Anyway, didn’t get a perfect grade in my second exam in thermodynamics. But high enough to get that uno(A).

The Best Thing That God Ever Created Is A New Day

I promised myself to get the Icelandic script of this tattooed when I graduate on time. I didn’t graduate on time. I failed one class. I had never failed any class during my 5 years in the university. Except my last semester before graduation.

Now they’re fighting and arguing about integrity issues and financial problems. All of these fighting because I didn’t graduate.

Yes, I take full blame and it was my fault. But what I don’t understand is why do the opinions of people outside of this family should matter with our own problems?

My dad, drunk as he was, went on how he was ashamed to answer when asked by his mates when is my grad celebration and had to say I didn’t graduate and taking summer class.

That made me cry. I hate it when people pretend they’re okay and fine but later on say they’re not and point out to you your mistakes and failures. It was as hard for him as it was for me.

No matter how I say my Dad’s approval doesn’t affect me it does mean something to me. He will be sober when he wake up and forget the words he said and probably didn’t mean. . But I won’t. I will wake up and just have to remind myself that it’s a new day.

Can I just live in a hotel forever?

Awesome weekend. :)

When a song expresses your thoughts and feelings better than your own words.

Clingy Overnight

  • Dinner (soup of gravy)
  • Went swimming, but there was no water in the pool!
  • Instead, went to the sauna. Gaah that always feel refreshing afterwards. 
  • Gossiped. Serious talks about the present, what’s going on in each others’ lives and a bit of the future. 
  • Past midnight, we walked around Eastwood and window-shopped for food at the food bazaar. We’re poor kids. 
  • Crazy Photo shoots
  • Went back at the condo and talked some more.
  • Both girls are asleep as I’m writing this. 

1 month ago / 2 notes / journal,
 
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